i haven't done blogging for sometime .. n i tink i ought to be back to share abit of wat i've been thru ... hmm, izit months or weeks ?? argh, can't recall .. okok, dun wanna kill any more of my brain cells...
it's been months of ups and downs ... eventful ? no, i dun tink so ... been thru an emotional whirlpool (exaggerating loh 
) ... am feeling tired after every episode of it ... i guess this is wat i have to go thru to strengthen my heart ... to break n to rebuild … i have been pretty exhausted ... my mind kept churning out stuff that i sometimes i can't even decipher ... sometimes it juz left me in a state of exhaustion, totally fused by it...
i learnt alot in the midst of working out how to unwind the entanglement of my thoughts … how God works is miraculous … HE does things that u least expected n mite not even cross ur mind of doing it .. but it works, it really, really works … I tink God is working in me …
in this time I really feel that I was shattered into a million pieces (exaggerating again, hehe ) n felt lost at certain point in time … in these period problems kept arising … all at one go n at one time … I try to juggle wif it for awhile … then I found it’s not wise at all .. I kept returning to the same point without much have been done … ponder n ponder n ponder … fussing n fussing n fussing ~ I was reluctant to submit these to God … I din know how to n I din want to … I realize that at these point many ppl would not wanna submit to God the problems they faced as they are afraid that they will not be able to accept the outcome that the Creator has for us … we juz can’t faced it …I have the same feeling too ... this hinders me too n I was so reluctant to submit my problems to God… God is so graceful, He let us choose … He never forces us to do anything ... n God never forced us to submit … but He's there to make sure that we dun get hurt ... He there for us in times of need coz God loves us very very much … our God is a compassionate God .. when He see us suffers He feel for us too ... but, letting us go thru it is for us to be stronger and ready for wat’s to come in eternity… when God find it’s too much for us .. He sent ppl whom we can seek comfort n lend us their ears … it’s a way of showing He’s there for us, can u see it ?
“For men are not cast off by the Lord forever. Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men.”
Lamentations 3:31~33
these few weeks … God has thought me how to submit to Him … it’s so difficult for me to submit … as I’m worried that I can’t faced the outcome … it’s the mind game again … I held on to all these … until I was really really exhausted n I realized at times like these … u’ll be drifted far apart from the ONE … being in your world wif ur worries … u r in ur own invisible bubble ~ away from everything … I shared it to a sis finally … n she has enlighten me … she told me … this is wat satan want from us .. to be away from our God bcoz he’s afraid of our growth ... by submitting to all worries prevent u from growing wif God … do u not wanna grow ?? do u not wanna submit all these to God n began to grow again?? I begin to realize soon after … I have so much fun growing wif God (this is true loh, keke)… how can I let the FUN end n sulk on all my worries in my entire life ?? NO NO … growing is too much FUN … how can yechow not have FUN !! hehe
Then I told myself to tell God how I felt n to submit n acknowledge all these b4 God … taking this step is difficult coz we wouldn’t wanna leave the comfort zone that we hav settled ourselves in … although these r worries (but worries does have its own comfort zone in our lives) … we rather brood over it n lie to ourselves than to accept the unknown reality that we r suppose to faced … I took that step … coz I know it has gone beyond me … I submit to God everytime when I felt weary … n soon after the peace has returned … day by day…
I still ponder on it .. but everytime the thought comes … I tell God I’m giving this to Him …
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you.”
James 4:7~8
ok …I’m done wif sharing ... have a great week n a blessed week today … may we continue to seek Him n grow wif Him 
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